Doubt and Competition
Socially I have always felt as though crowds are not my thing. I don’t like a lot of people. I am a small group, one on one, intimate type of person. I stay solo dolo and can rock by myself. I knew starting a business I would force me out of my comfort zone. I can engage with anyone and I am not afraid to meet new people, I just don’t like to perform in front of people. When you have your own business you are it and it is you. Today, I was working and getting a plan together to network with some businesses. I was doing some research about a few of them and a wave of anxiety came over me from the top of my head and with through my whole body like a shock wave. I took some calm breaths and repeated my mantra, “I Know, I Love, I Trust, several times. Doubt and fear was attempting to derail my focus. The Ego lays and waits to pounce on you when you are motivated and momentum is picking up. I hadn’t even actually acted yet, I was just gathering Intel basically, but I created this instant doubt and uncertainty within myself that was so inaccurate and false. In my life I have had many vices and they have evolved over the years. These things have ranged from pointless shopping, adrenaline seeking choices, alcohol, popping pills, sex, weed, alcohol, sex, weed. All this shit to numb and reduce the chatter. After years of actively discovering and learning who I am, I have realized I control the dial to the chatter. I can change the station, take this thought and let it live or kill it instantly. I refuse to be a victim to fear anymore. I will do what I need to do for myself and for my business to be successful and I will not allow social anxiety to attempt to disturb my peace and progress. My war has never been with anyone outside myself. I have been in a silent personal war within for years. I have now learned how to tolerate and get my balance bubble back at the center point. Today I won this battle and may face others but I know the symbols and signs and have a tool kit equipped and support system ready to assist.
Society can give a false perception that other people’s view of you matter. People tend to think you have to be in competition if you are all doing the same thing. It is approximately 7.7 billion people in this world and approximately 157 million women in the United States. Everybody not doing the same thing and if so definitely not the same way. It is enough to go around a few times and we all be good. The real competition lies within. There are a lot of women coming into the knowledge of steaming and I am elated and excited for the healing and elevation that comes with women becoming empowered and armed with knowledge of self love and healing. Steaming has helped me release so many stagnate emotions that I physically carried for so long. It has given me so much clarity and purpose. I may be in the same field as you but trust we are not the same. No malice, receive that how it feeds you. We must deal with that lack of love inside to really appreciate and be genuinely happy for others in all aspects. Failure to do that can be detrimental to you personally as well to your business. Focus on your lane and keep that wheel steady on the road for your journey. Always stay aware of the traffic and your surroundings but keep your eyes on the road and deal with what is happening in your vehicle.